2nd Childhood Days

Second Childhood days is more then just a frame of mind…  some times it’s a cold hard reality, and not just a frame of mind.  When you get closer to 60, you start having 2nd Childhood moments… and they become ever increasing in frequency, intensity, and duration. So if you’ve already gotten there… you probably know what I mean… if you haven’t… here’s a sample of what you can expect. I know… it’s all been said before… “That won’t happen to me” … but, yea… it will. The worst part is… it’s the simplest things or tasks that always seem to be involved.

• shoe laces will be more difficult to tie (never a 10 year old around when you need them)
• shoe laces will always go into knots when you undo them ( must be fate)
• screws and nails will never go in straight ( first law of the universe)
• measure twice, cut once… never works out right (duh)
• nothing… repeat nothing is ever straight ( but it looked straight a minute ago)
• nothing is ever where you left it ( I think the wife has something to do with this)
• I just had it, right here, now where is it (the new order of things… gremlins? )
• say it aloud 3 times to remember it (no use… it’s gone)
• put something small into a small hole (never happens) ( BTW… don’t go there)
• why are cell phones so complicated… I just want to dial a number. (apps!!! ???)
• Child guard caps only make it hard for adults ( arggg )
• Papers always stick together ( licking fingers no longer works)
• rechargeables always need recharging before use (second law of the universe)
• you always wake up early when you need the sleep the most (yawn all day)
• you can fall asleep in the chair, Tv blaring… but not in the quiet bedroom. (too quiet)
• why won’t this lid screw back on right? ( I don’t like peanut butter anyway)
• I remember things lasting longer when I was a kid ( everything made to wear out quicker now)
• Nothing can be fixed anymore… it’s all disposable. ( no user serviceable parts inside)
• Why do they always say you “Id or password is incorrect” ?? (don’t they know which one?)
• “help” and instructions are NOT written for the laymen (need an 8 years degree)
• everyone else worries about spelling, grammar, and punctuation ( who gives a rats arse) “F7”
• explain to me why I need to shave all seven days of the week. ( I need a break 1 or 2 days)
• you can never pour anything into another bottle without spilling it ( 3rd law of the universe)
• doing the same thing over & over and expecting different results always worked before (always)
• remembering what you put into that unmarked bottle… not happening ( yea… when you spilled it)
• Hammers can fix anything… not really but it feels good! ( it’s called therapy)
• rubber bands never broke when I was a kid ( made better?  )
• ya leave your finger prints everywhere, especially the fridge ( so don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time)
• when you wife says “What?”, she doesn’t want you to repeat it… she’s just giving you a chance to change your response.
• shoes walk away by themselves… never where you left them ( wife again )
• washing hands never  use to leave water splatter everywhere ( go figure)
• “passwords” … why can’t I use the same one for everything… ( 1 , that’s easy to remember… okay… 1-2-3-4-5).
• “Auto complete” … it thinks it knows what I’m trying to say and auto corrects it ( “dear it all”… SEE! )
• spell checker… trying to spell a word that starts with “S”… options include words that start with “B’ or something else… so what’s up with that?  (BIG … ARGGG) betcha didn’t know “arse” was a real word either.
• I’m tired, ready for bed, feels like 11pm… I look at the clock… OMG… it’s only 7pm. (early to bed, early to rise… just makes you tired the rest of the day… then repeat the cycle all over again… OMG… it’s only 7pm) 

 Well… you get the picture… and if you don’t right now… you will someday! See… you do have plenty of stuff to look forward to… and if you are already there… this should make you feel better (at least a little)… knowing that you are NOT alone.