Just a few random thoughts on getting old…
Emotional wellbeing… now there's a topic. Getting older brings many things to mind. Your life in the past, your life now, and thoughts of your life in the future. Thoughts of health issues. Thoughts of getting older and what will happen later in life. And naturally and eventually, thoughts of… well, to put it bluntly… thought's of the end, and dying. As youthful immortality fades with age, our own mortality becomes ever increasingly oblivious and inevitable. Not much comfort in the possibilities. More and more of your friends are having serious health issues and passing away. When you were a working productive part of society your were merely just a number, just one of the small parts that made the whole thing work, easily replaced by another worker. When older, society as we know it here… well… you're even less then that number. Your usefulness to society is all but gone. Your experience and wisdom falls on deaf ears, and that's even if there was even someone to even listen. And technology has steadily passed you by making you not only old, but outdated as well. While you are slowing down the world is ever increasing it's speed to keep outpacing you, leaving you further and further behind.
Emotional wellbeing… questionable as to what it really is. I guess we all want the same thing… I live as healthy as we can for as long as we can. Perhaps my grandfather had the chance to get it right. He lived basically healthy until he was well into his eighties… and then was gone in the blink of an eye… not having to suffer with personal health problems. Of course living well into you eighties means seeing almost everyone you knew die before you. All the heartache and despair of witnessing so many, if not mostly all, die before you. Seeing the world pass you by, in leaps and bounds, past your experience. Having experienced so much of life so long and seeing so many things. Trying to remember all the good in your life, and good in the world, as it's overshadowed by war, crime, dishonestly, greed, and every other negative trait that permeates society. The longer you live the more negative you've been exposed to. It all seems a bit overwhelming. You've watched your grandparents die, your parents die… aunts and uncles all gone. Many loose a spouse, and in the worse case scenario you loose a child or grandchild. Not sure how people bear this. Is it more selfish to want to live longer knowing that most will die before you… or spare yourself the heartache and pass on at a more average age… sparing yourself the heartache, and leaving others to endure your loss. Can you ever reach a point of emotional wellbeing living so long past the average age of dying and seeing so many go before you.
All good thoughts and questions. But I guess it's like most people say… Life goes on. But how does one cheerfully live on having seen most of your family and friends go before you. And there are those that you can not bear to loose, but it happens. Society is done with you… and compassion as far as society goes was never much to begin with. How does one feel to live to be well beyond the average in years. How does one feel to be ninety? … having lost so much?
Surely all the good memories are a least somewhat tainted by the losses. Every good memory will conclude with a final negative thought. How does one get by this reality?
Looking back… you know how you felt at different times in your life… but probably couldn't have predicted or known how you would have felt in advance… lets say 5–10 years in advance. Feelings are a product of experience, and the most recent experiences generally have a greater influence on today's feelings verses those from your more distant past.
Well… I guess we won't have any of the answers unless we may be fortunate enough to actually get there… into our seventies, eighties , or nineties. And I guess everyone's experiences and feelings will be different… just a they were in a younger life.
Good days… sad days… and hopefully the emotional wellbeing to see and remember mostly the good while discarding the not so good. One day at a time… stopping to smell the roses… and just enjoy still being alive… and counting your blessings for what you still have… and fond memories of what is now gone. Yep, life is worth living to the fullest. Hoping to touch someone else's life, making their life a little happier and brighter… making your own life all the more precious… both to others and yourself.
Well, as I said, just some random thoughts… of someone that's getting older, day by day.
